Reflections on Trust and Explicit Kindness

But one of the major lessons I was forced to confront early in the year was remembering to trust the process.

For many people (myself included), 2017 wasn’t an easy year. We were tested, tired, felt depressed and hospitalised. We ended relationships, lost loved ones and found ourselves searching for directions.  But one of the major lessons I was forced to confront early in the year was remembering to trust the process.

Trust the Process

Trust for the process of change and growth is revealed in diverse ways and at its best, creates amazingly strong foundations from which our understanding and patience can flourish. When present it can, and does, open doors for deep sharing of delicate, vulnerable, and sensitive aspects of our past or present inner experiences.

In some profound way it can enable us to be more fully who we really are, freed from the need to wear masks of pretence and empowered to embrace and accept the parts of ourselves we might fear most.

To be able to let go (and let God) made me so aware of how important it was to be able to trust myself and others with my fears and anxieties without fear of judgment or being pathologized as not coping. In some profound way it can enable us to be more fully who we really are, freed from the need to wear masks of pretence and empowered to embrace and accept the parts of ourselves we might fear most.

As I reflect on this past year; another major lesson I’m looking to build on is my capability to choose explicit kindness at every turn.

Amidst the discomfort of transition, I knew (and was constantly reminded) something greater existed on the other side. It is in the fall that we get up again, it is the heartbreak that we learn to love again and in the perceived directionless that our horizons expand beyond what we could have imagined.

Explicit Kindness

As I reflect on this past year; another major lesson I’m looking to build on is my capability to choose explicit kindness at every turn. What is this, you ask? Note, It’s easier said than done, but I’ll do my best to explain.

Explicit kindness doesn’t translate to meekness or passivity, it is honest and unafraid of disappointment.

Having intentions is only as good as the action we put behind them.  So to be explicitly kind to ourselves and others, means not simply having intention alone, but transforming said intention into action. Action that isn’t downgraded by our self doubt or internal conflicting dialogue, but action which feels natural to you at the moment. Doing so is honestly and truly a major leap for mankind (or at least you).

I’d like to consider myself as a genuinely nice person, but sometimes my intentions don’t always match up with my actions.

Explicit kindness doesn’t translate to meekness or passivity, it is honest and unafraid of disappointment. And most importantly, it is willing to shoot it only straight, and not with bullsh*t.

I’d like to consider myself as a genuinely nice person, but sometimes my intentions don’t always match up with my actions. And sometimes my kindness is taken for granted. And most times I allow it. Overall this is my nature, I can’t help it. I’m kind, or I intend to be anyways. You know, kind to both self and others at most times, that’s me!

So what does this tell me about myself?

Ok, fine, I do acknowledge my intentions to do so does not always translate to explicit action (which happens often). On the other side of the coin, my kindness causes me to allow awkward social situations to carry on longer than it needs to. So what does this tell me about myself? This a question I continue to ponder and hope to explore further as I put into perspective lessons learned from this past year.

So 2017, thank you for the lessons learned, may we learn, grow and flourish from them in the year to come.

 What are your own life’s lessons? Which lessons do you want to build on most in the new year? Let me know in the comments below!

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About the Author
Mariel Kanene is Founder and Editor of TheArtOfPersptive.co and lead storyteller with a focus on music, startups and travel. His passion for storytelling was born in Kinshasa, Congo, groomed in Dallas, Texas, and cultivated in Washington, DC where he now resides. By day, Mariel spends his days slowly trying to change the world—one meaningful interaction at a time. He loves reading factual-fiction, good podcasts, traveling, health and fitness, foreign languages and good conversations over good coffee and even better rum. He hates talking about himself in third person.Thanks for stopping by. Always appreciated. Find me on: Twitter | Instagram | Linkedin | Website.

 

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